Ingrid shared on our Facebook Page: “I was a bit embarrassed to realize that all my problems and people I didn’t like were a reflection of me. I didn’t want to accept that I had those ugly habits – lol.”
That’s what most of us do – resist – exactly why the Concepts help so much.
Resistance comes because we want to keep our façade up. We want the world to see us the way we choose it to see us. We don’t want it to look underneath at what is really there. We don’t want to lift the façade because we judge what is under it so harshly. “I am nothing/worthless/a fake.” “If people really knew me…”, “If I really looked at myself…” So we resist. We fight. We defend. We pretend. If it doesn’t work we’re angry, resentful, blaming. All in a desperate effort to hide who we think we really are.
The saddest part is that this part of us that we are locking up, resisting, ashamed of is not a monster. It is a beautiful, wise essence of our selves. A part that we believed to be judged or hurt so we judged and hurt it ourselves. We covered the door to our essence with falseness and lies and it is the tearing down of this wall that is painful; tearing down all the defenses that we have built up over a life time so we could hide.
Because deep inside something is crying. Dying. Some part of us we won’t allow to be real; refuse to let express who we really were, or what we are really feeling. Some part we leave locked in the dark basement of our being, ashamed of its very existence and working hard to pretend it’s not there.
Only in unlocking the door and letting that part of ourselves come to light do we find joy and peace. As we bring to light the layers of guilt and shame, the judging others because we don’t want to look at how we judge ourselves, the places where we ignore our own needs to get approval, the pretending everything is all right and hiding our true feelings – sometimes even from ourselves, only then to we discover who we truly are.
Beyond all the judgments, when we accept that we are who we are, that we have done what we’ve done and what we’ve done is just what we’ve done – it’s not us; then we can get to our essence. That beautiful part of ourselves that rests beyond all of the personality’s cover ups, judgments and attempts to survive. That part of us that simply glows with beauty, light and love, – our essence. Who we truly are.
It’s time to set ourselves free. Thanks for the reminder Ingrid.
~ Nancy Baker
Excerpt from “Living the 55 Concepts” by Michael Cavallaro and Friends.
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